Pregnant with her second child, working, teaching, and caring for her mother, who was undergoing cancer treatments, Natasha Mosby found herself finally following her own advice: Ask for help.
“I can’t cook,” Mosby laughed, as she recalled her breakthrough moment. “So I asked my mom, would it be OK if (my husband) made her meals?”
Mosby is a licensed clinical social worker, lecturer, and project coordinator in the 51ԹϺ School of Social Work. Knowing that it was important for her mother, Bobbie C. Summers, to keep her sense of independence, Mosby made sure that she asked for her permission first. Summers prided herself on her autonomy, so maintaining a sense of self and decision-making abilities was essential.
Summers eventually agreed and, along with her son-in-law, the two made meals together. Although her mother passed away 12 years ago, Mosby says the lessons that she learned in taking care of her have carried over to how she instructs students in the social work graduate program.
Her classes that focus on an integrated behavioral approach. Students learn how to help their clients understand how their physical and emotional well-being is connected. In addition, students learn cultural competency and why family dynamics differ depending on socioeconomic status, cultural background, and generational traditions.
As a clinical social worker, Mosby has counseled family members on both sides of the spectrum: the caretakers and their aging parents. Both groups want to understand how to navigate their reversal of roles as they progress into this new chapter of their lives.
Seeing parents age, become sick, slow down, or require help can be hard on its own, Mosby said. But the caregiver may also be in what is called , which is when adults typically in their 40s and 50s have a parent who is 65 years old or older and also are either raising a young child or financially supporting a grown child who is 18 years old or older.
“Watching my mom go from this super active, Superwoman role — that was hard for me, because I thought she’d never get sick. I thought she’d forever be this giant in my eyes,” Mosby said. “I had to be OK with being scared. I was scared. Clients are afraid of their aging and their mortality. You’re watching this person change, and maybe coping with whether this will be your experience.”
Mosby offered tips for caregivers on ways to manage stress and why therapy can help manage emotions so that families can maintain mutual respect and strengthen bonds.
For the purpose of this article, the term “caregiver” will be applied to a child caring for a parent; however,